The lives of adolescents is a whirlwind of conflict and change physically, emotionally and socially. They live new feelings, facing new challenges and trying to carve a place in the world around them. They all want to be independent, but they need parents to pay their bills, lend the car and see their basic needs like food and accommodation not to mention the jeans couture. Living with a teenager is not easy, it's like to sit in the front pew of the highest and longest roller coaster. One minute you're full of pride for your teen, then a few seconds later you would blame the dirty dishes in the sink and the gas tank empty. How to live in harmony with your teenager?
Here are ten tips:
1. Remember your teenage
Try to remember your own adolescence. What were your impressions of fashion? What were your greatest fears? How have you demonstrated your spirit of rebellion? Your memories of adolescence will help you understand what is happening in your teen and encourage communication. You can easily feel the upheaval that your teen lives in terms of emotions and hormones and show more sensitivity, acceptance and understanding.
2. Spend time with your teen
they show or not, teens need the support and acceptance from their parents. Parents and teenagers often have busy schedules and are struggling to make time together. But showing your teen that you are available to him, you show him that you care about his life and that you support unconditionally.
Establish a weekly family night where all members meet and discuss their day. Or organize a "regular output" to dinner and a movie for you and your teen. You can also register for a course that interests you both or to volunteer together. Whatever activity you choose, what is most important thing is that you have fun together.
3. Stay tuned!
Listening is one of the most important qualities of a parent. Your teenager must feel that you listen to his opinions, and he can count on you if he needs help.
By taking the time to listen to what he has to tell you, you will have a greater influence in his life. You know what happens at school and with friends, as well as the challenges it faces. Just listen and not judge him. Show him you're interested in all aspects of his life and that you respect his ideas. You may find it even starts to listen to you!
4. Do not avoid difficult topics
Drugs, sex, alcohol, violence: these are some of the pressures that youth face. You may feel uncomfortable addressing these issues, but protecting your teen goes before the discomfort. Teens should know the facts about these issues. You also need to communicate your values and beliefs, family and explain the behavior you expect of them.
It may be that you do not know how to react if your teen suddenly asks you questions about condoms or ask if you ever smoked marijuana. Be honest and understanding. If you do not know the answer, tell them and then ask! Do not judge
your teen and do not criticize him if he expresses thoughts or feelings of a sexual nature. Whether you like it or not, it is becoming an adult and must have accurate information to make informed choices in the future.
5. Renegotiate responsibilities and privileges
Teenagers need rules to follow. But it is important to renegotiate responsibilities and privileges as they grow. By changing the rules and tasks so that they correspond more to their age, you send them a message of trust and respect.
Remember to include your teen in these renegotiations, to listen to his views and find common ground that pleases everyone.
6. Be a role model and display your values
It is important to show as a model for your teenager and to transmit your values.
For example, eating healthy meals and accepting your body, you will have a greater influence on self-image of your daughter as videos and magazines. It is the same for your reaction to stress, your ability to control your anger and attitude to alcohol and drugs.
7. Choose your battles
Green hair, the bedroom in disarray, curfews exceeded. The list of battles can be long. You may think that your teen does everything for you grate on the nerves! The best solution is to choose your battles.
In criticizing the details, you can end up creating an atmosphere of constant bickering and negative feelings between you and your teen. Keep your energy (and mental health) to discuss topics that really matter: drugs, school performance, sexual behavior and other values. If you choose your battles, your teen is more likely to listen to you when you address important issues.
8. Welcome their friends into your home
Your teen probably spent more time with his friends than you. To keep you abreast of what is happening in his life, make sure that your home is a welcoming environment for his friends.
By allowing your teen to invite friends to watch movies or play video games, you show that you care about his life. In addition, you'll rest in peace because you know where he is, what it does and that he frequents. It also allows you to learn more about his friends.
9. Talk with other adults
Talk to other parents and share your experiences to help you better cope with the emotions and problems of adolescence. Discuss family conflicts and try to find innovative solutions. Sometimes it is enough to know that we are not alone in the crisis of adolescence.
Also contact your teen's teachers. They will tell you if it has problems at school and prevent shock when you receive a school report.
10. Show them you love them
Finally, try daily to find reasons for their compliments and highlight their accomplishments, whether large or small. Place notes on the fridge or in their backpack to tell them you love them and do not be afraid to ask gestures of affection. By giving them hugs, kisses and even a good handshake, you show them that even if their life changes, your love would remain forever.
End
Source
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